Somebody asked about ideas or practices to improve the skill of relaxation. Here are my thoughts:
Awareness.
First, of how often we feel stressed and if it really bothers us. Surprisingly, for a lot of people being stressed is their comfort zone. Do we understand it’s a problem and if we do, do we even notice it happens to us?
Second, awareness of triggers and body signals. Our reactions. Is it better to react or to respond? Can we get used to the latter? I believe we can, but again, only if we recognize that reacting is a problem.
Quiet time.
Meditation has never really worked for me. I’ve tried sitting down and focusing on my breathing, but I ended up feeling more tense than relaxed. I do run every day, though, and I don’t remember what I think about while I’m running, so I guess that’s my form of meditation.
Breathing is really important, something I’m trying to improve. I find it hard to breathe through my nose, for example.
Doing physical exercises is key IMO, whatever it is, but at a moderate intensity. There’s something about elevating our heart rate that helps with our overall balance. Maybe there are studies about it.
Environment.
The things we own, the things we use. The people we spend time with. Our routines. The expectations of everyone involved. Our perspectives. Accepting what we can change and what we can’t change. The food we eat of course. We’re very good at justifying what we don’t want to change, but we expect others to change for us.
Handwriting.
This is a very powerful practice. I’ve experienced an incredible transformation by writing in my notebook. The interesting thing is that it works best when we get our minds in a calm/positive state before writing things down. What do I write down? my dreams, goals, people I want to help, causes I want to contribute, impacts I want to create, and changes I want to make.